What I Really Meant to Say
by ChelsiNicole
Summary: A AU Season7 song fic… Spike has came back to Sunnydale… everyone knows he has a soul and One night Buffy and Spike bump into each other at the Bronze… Plain and simple. Any Questions?


Author: Chelbell  
  
Title: What I Really Meant to Say  
  
Rating: PG. I'm so not liking the NC-17 band on ff.net. Off we their heads! ^_^  
  
Summary: A AU Season7 song fic. Spike has came back to Sunnydale. everyone knows he has a soul and One night Buffy and Spike bump into each other at the Bronze. Plain and simple. Any Questions?  
  
Feedback: It quiets the voices in my head. Flames will be used to toast marshmallows -- that's for you ;-)  
  
Disclaimer: Ok so I was in a diner and I saw Joss Whedon walk in and I was like "Hey Joss! Over here man!" So he takes a seat. I can see he's looking a lil sheepish so I ask him what's wrong. He just shakes his head and motions for a waitress. The waitress asks him what he wants and he says "a salad and water." "Joss!", I scream, "You have to eat more than that!" He nods his head and explains quietly, "I'm out of cash. You know with getting "Firefly" up and running I haven't even been able to afford James Marsters those lil purple grapes that he likes in his dressing room." He continues on but my mind wonders off to James Marsters and lil purple grapes. Yum. ". so I can't even afford a cup of Joe right now." "Oh," I sigh, "Well, I'll make you a deal. I'll buy you some good old Java if you let me have James Marsters." The waitress by now has put the water down in front of him. BIG mistake on my part. He throws it in my face and leaves screaming "You can't have James! He's mine! All mine! Muhahahaha!" I wipe the water off my face. "Um. that went well. Check please!" They I realized that Joss didn't even pay for his meal.*sigh* I cannot believe that jerk. oh well I guess I owed him for bringing such a great show like BtVS to our lives. *sigh* but I swear to bob if he makes Dawn slayer I WILL hunt him down! ( Oh and Lyrics belong to Cyndi Thompson and Co.  
  
Get it? Got it? Good! Now on with the show..  
  
A/N: Lyrics are in between ** and thoughts are in between these : ~ ok? goooood  
  
§¤~What I Really Meant To Say~¤§  
  
She hadn't been here in awhile. The Bronze, that is. She's been too busy. Busy either doing her new good at the Hell. I mean. The rebuilt High School. Or thinking about. No, She wasn't going to think about "him" tonight. Not when she was with her friends. Tonight she wasn't Buffy The Vampire Lover or Buffy The Sister slash Mom or Buffy the oh so great friend. Tonight she was just. Buffy. Tonight, she wasn't going to worry about anyone or anything else but herself and Dawn.  
  
"Buffy! Over here! Buffy!" Her best friend Xander called with her sister sitting right by him. She smile and slowly made her way over to him. "Hi Xand. Hi. Dawnie." She soon looked over to see her sister staring blankly at the new boy at school. "Dawn!" she shouted. ~At least that got her attention~, Buffy thought to herself.  
  
"Buffy!" Dawn exclaimed. But however it was now Buffy's turn to not pay attention. She was too busy looking. Looking for him. She knew he was here. She could feel him. "I'll be right back. No boy watching Dawn." Dawn pouted.  
  
Buffy walked slowly to the bar where she grabbed a Cosmopolitan and glanced around again for the blond vamp. not knowing he was watching her.  
  
As she gave up and turned around to take her seat, she bumped into Spike.  
  
"S-Spike." "'elo Luv," He said with a nervous smile. They both looked around; Spike looked at the top of her head while Buffy suddenly found her shoes utterly fascinating. It wasn't even ten seconds that they had been standing there. Though it seemed like forever before Buffy spoke up.  
  
"How are ya doing?" she finally looked up to see him staring loving down at her which made her quickly glance back to her shoes again.  
  
"I-I'm doing fine. It kind of rough having a soul after 120 bloody years of well. not having one." That made her laugh a little. "Buffy," She looked up at him. ~The way he said my name. it just poured out of his mouth. through those beautiful lips.~ "Y-Yeah?" she answered shakily  
  
~Ask her to dance! ASK HER TO DANCE!~ his mind told him. "How are you doing, pet?"  
  
Buffy looked disappointed. " I-I'm OK. The old High School reopened." She said trying to produce small talk.  
  
"Yeah. They opened the bloody Hell mouth. What bloody morons." he scowled.  
  
Buffy nodded. They both look each other square in the eye when they heard a familiar song being played by the DJ.  
  
**It took me by surprise  
  
When I saw you standin' there  
  
Close enough to touch  
  
Breathin' the same air  
  
You asked me how I'd been  
  
I guess that's when I smiled and said just fine  
  
Oh, but baby I was lyin'**  
  
~Wow.~ Buffy thought, ~this song was exactly like her and Spike.~ Meanwhile Spike thought the same thing. Ok OK. They didn't breath the same air because, well, he didn't need to breath. You know, the whole 'being-dead' thing. But that was besides the point.  
  
"Buffy, do you." Spike said, ~Oh stop being a bloody wanker!~ "Oh bloody hell," he whispered to himself. "Do you want to dance?"  
  
Buffy smiled. "Yes, I'd love to, Spike."  
  
Spike smiled also as they walked hand- in- hand out to the dance floor.  
  
**What I really meant to say  
  
Is I'm dyin' here inside  
  
And I miss you more each day  
  
There's not a night I haven't cried  
  
And baby, here's the truth  
  
I'm still in love with you  
  
(And, that's what I really meant to say)**  
  
So there they danced. Vampire and Vampire Slayer. Buffy had her arms around his neck and his arms was wrapped around her waist. They both held on to each other like they were holding on for dear life. Buffy breathed in his scent. The smell that she had dreams about during the summer. The smell of cinnamon, whiskey, and. Wait. Something was missing.  
  
Buffy pulled back and they both moaned at the loss of each other's embrace.  
  
"Spike? Did you quit smoking?"  
  
Spike looked surprised but answered anyways, "Yeah. how did you know?"  
  
Buffy smiled and wrapped her arms around her neck and rested her head where his neck met his shoulders. "You smelled different."  
  
Spike smiled and breathed in the scent of her hair. vanilla.  
  
**What I really meant to say  
  
Is I'm really not that strong  
  
No matter how I try  
  
I'm still holdin' on  
  
And here's the honest truth  
  
I'm still in love with you  
  
And, that's what I really meant to say  
  
That's what I really meant to say  
  
That's what I really meant to say**  
  
The song ended and the couple split apart. Spike pulled her back, kissed her on the cheek and told her he loved her. He went to walk away but she called after him.  
  
"Spike!"  
  
He turned around to look at her. She looked at Xander who looked at them with a shocked expression. ~Oh screw him.~ she thought. She then ran up to Spike and jumped on him hugging him and peppering his face with kisses. She kept murming 'I love you's' and words of love to him and Spike swore that tears of joy sprang oout of his eyes and down his cheeks.  
  
Xander and Dawn watched the whole thing and so did the rest of the night club. Xander went to stand up but Dawn pulled him back to sit down. "She's happy, Xander. Don't you want that for her?"  
  
Xander couldn't think of anything to say. So Dawn kissed him on the cheek and told him that she had a feeling that he would be happy too. soon.  
  
Xander and Dawn both watched Spike and Buffy walk out of the club together.  
  
"Ut oh." Dawn said. "Xand, can I stay with you? Buffy and Spike are really loud when they." At Xander's horrified expression Dawn stopped. "Alllllrighty."  
  
Xander quickly picked up his beer and drank it, producing a loud blech.  
  
"Ew. Xander Harris you have got to learn some manners. That was very rude you know?" Xander turned around to find Anya looking down from where she was standing. He smiled. Maybe Dawn was right.  
  
"Anya do you want to dance?"  
  
THE END!!!!! or tbc?? REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!! 


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